#1 Sharks can’t heat up Dino nuggies in the microwave
#2 Sharks can’t take their dog for a walk
#3 Sharks can’t lick their finger and stick it in someone’s ear
#4 Sharks can’t take the trash out
#5 Sharks can’t reheat French fries in the microwave only to be disappointed they aren’t as good as they were the first time
#6 Sharks can’t put their feet up on the dash
#7 Sharks can’t take the bar exam
#8 Sharks can’t congratulate someone on LinkedIn
#9 Sharks can’t read a teleprompter
#10 Sharks can’t vote in local elections
#11 Sharks can’t pick a wedgie
#12 Sharks can’t write a resume
#13 Sharks can’t merge on the highway
#14 Sharks can’t do a Shaggy impression
#15 Sharks can’t laugh and spit water everywhere
#16 Sharks can’t go see bad Cinderella
#17 Sharks can’t like and subscribe down below
#18 Sharks can’t go to law school
#19 Sharks can’t get pulled over for speeding
#20 Sharks can’t be charged for aggravated assault
#21 Sharks can’t be arrested with DUIs
#22 Sharks can’t drive a car through a car wash
#23 Sharks can’t reset the wifi router
#24 Sharks can’t merge into oncoming traffic on the highway
#25 Sharks can’t pump their own gas
#26 Sharks can’t get their gas pumped for them in New Jersey
#27 Sharks can’t renovate their kitchen
#28 Sharks can’t install solar panels on their roof
#29 Sharks can’t do home improvement
#30 Sharks can’t do P90X
#31 Sharks can’t play dodgeball in gym class
#32 Sharks can’t play just dance
#33 Sharks can’t cut a ribbon with scissors for a grand opening
#34 Sharks can’t produce an episode of Newswatch Sunday
#35 Sharks can’t accidentally use a diesel nozzle at the gas station
#36 Sharks can’t produce a thesis film
#37 Sharks can’t invest in the stock market
#38 Sharks can't lose money in the stock market
#39 Sharks can’t play iMessage games
#40 Sharks can’t play Monopoly
#41 Sharks can’t ask “are we there yet” during a long car ride
#42 Sharks can’t get an internship at WABC
#43 Sharks can’t tie a tie and neither can I
#44 Sharks can’t get their learners permit
#45 Sharks can’t fill their unwashed hydroflask with the college dorm brita
#46 Sharks can’t major in photography
#47 Sharks can’t try on clothes in a fitting room
#48 Sharks can’t mine gold
#49 Sharks can’t delete posts off of social media
#50 Sharks can’t ask “can you hear me now” with sprint because they switched to Verizon
#51 Sharks can’t drive over the yellow lines that make the weird noise
#52 Sharks can’t accidentally place orders on their parents Amazon prime account
#53 Sharks can’t do their taxes
#54 Sharks can’t accidentally order a vibrator on their parents Amazon account
#55 Sharks can’t walk into a liquor store and try to buy something underage and when the cashier asks for their id they say “oh I forgot it in my car” and then leave the store and drive away
#56 Sharks can’t laugh at their own jokes (they also can’t make jokes)
#57 Sharks can’t walk into any public setting without someone getting uncomfortable
#58 Sharks can’t click the “still there” button when waze asks if there is a car stopped on the side 0f the road
#59 Sharks can’t watch the DVD symbol float around the screen and wait for it to hit the corner
#60 Sharks can’t sing in a choir
#61 Sharks can’t call shotgun before they see the car
#62 Sharks can’t use defrosters in the car
#63 Sharks can’t accidentally leave their windows cracked open in the car and then it rains and it soaks their seats
#64 Sharks can’t fix a busted tail light
#65 Sharks can’t parallel park
#66 Sharks can’t guess how to spell words close enough so that autocorrect fills it in for them
#67 Sharks can’t go hiking around the city of gorges
#68 Sharks can’t be diagnosed with clinical depression
#69 Sharks can’t slurp through a straw when the drink is all gone and now it’s making that awful noise
#70 Sharks can’t comprehend the idea of Taylor swift and her “Taylor’s version”
#71 Sharks can’t have to pee so bad in the car they need to pull over
#72 Sharks can’t do construction
#73 Sharks can’t log into IC Engage
#74 Sharks don’t have an @ithaca.edu
#75 Sharks can’t park in the visitors lot
#76 Sharks can’t ride off into the sunset
#77 Sharks can’t do ballet
#78 Sharks can't panic when their website doesn't work
#79 Sharks can’t skip a song on Spotify
#80 Sharks can’t text their mom to ask what the Netflix password is
#81 Sharks can't forget to reapply sunscreen
#82 Sharks can't shoot hoops
#83 Sharks can't argue about politics during thanksgiving dinner
#84 Sharks can't be sad when they leave their study abroad destination
#85 Sharks can't burn the roof of their mouth on the inside of a microwave poptart
#86 Sharks can't tell their sibling to wash the bacon pan
#87 Sharks can't study abroad
#88 Sharks can't get into a submarine operated by a knock off xbox controller